Poor Hunter Biden.
Will his endless trials and tribulations never end? He was admitted to the prestigious Georgetown University and Yale University Law School not based on his grades, but solely on the fact that his father was a Senator. He was given a cushy $50,000 a month board seat at Burisma not based on his energy expertise, but solely on the fact that his father was Vice President. He received millions from Chinese businesses for the same reason. He sold ‘art’ for an average of $55,000 a pop despite having less talent as a painter than a monkey in a zoo because his father was President.
Most recently, also because his father was President, he received a blanket pardon for any and all crimes spanning an entire decade.
But wouldn’t you know it? His suffering still continues.
On Wednesday, according to a report from Fox News, his legal team announced that he was dropping his lawsuit against former White House aide Garrett Zeigler, citing the younger Biden’s ‘financial woes.’
Aww. Maybe his buddies in Moscow or Beijing can throw him a fundraiser.
Hunter Biden’s financial woes revealed in new motion to drop lawsuit: ‘Significant debt’ https://t.co/qvI7XlP99q
— Fox News (@FoxNews) March 6, 2025
Hunter Biden’s legal team recently filed a motion to drop his lawsuit against the ex-White House aide who published the contents of his infamous laptop, citing financial issues.
The motion, filed in Los Angeles Wednesday, pertains to the former first son’s lawsuit against Garrett Ziegler. The court documents, obtained by Fox News, illustrate the financial and personal issues Biden has experienced in the new year, including being a victim of the wildfires in the Pacific Palisades in Los Angeles.
‘Plaintiff has suffered a significant downturn in his income and has significant debt in the millions of dollars range,’ the document states.
Hang on. We’re a little emotionally choked up right now out of sympathy.
No, wait. We’re not.
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And Biden does NOT get to paint himself as a victim because of the wildfires. He lived in a $30,000-a-month Malibu home paid for by the Secret Service (in other words, paid for by taxpayers) in 2022. Then he moved to a $16,000-a-month home in 2023, also funded by us.
he can always go work as an energy guru for Burisma again, no? https://t.co/CxtqEwwpi2
— zerohedge (@zerohedge) March 6, 2025
Funny how foreign corporations are no longer knocking down his door begging him to come and not work for them.
What could possibly have changed from just a few months ago?
Why can’t he find work as a consultant to an energy company? Or, he could always sell some of his artwork. With his “smarts” and international connections he ought to be able to land on his feet 🤷🏼♀️ https://t.co/h2W0EwR2DS
— Helen Herndon (@helen_herndon) March 6, 2025
Can someone explain?
— Brock (@BN_OTAKU) March 6, 2025
Sorry. It’s a total conundrum
There were some theories, though.
Hunter Biden had foreign oligarchs all over the world demanding his services and offering to give him millions in cash, cars, and diamonds. I wonder why he can’t get that same work now that his dad isn’t president. What a puzzle. https://t.co/2se3LmLmVK
— Sean Davis (@seanmdav) March 6, 2025
Maybe we can get Unsolved Mysteries on the case. Is that show still on?
Or maybe someone can ask Philip Bump of The Washington Post to investigate.
Philip Bump at the WaPo will refuse to connect these dots, and there are only two of them. https://t.co/S7VzdEhesd
— Doug Powers (@ThePowersThatBe) March 6, 2025
Hmm. On second thought, maybe Bump will just throw up his hands at the unsolvable nature of this puzzle. 
Regardless of the complex question of why Hunter Biden can’t get work or earn an income these days, the outpouring of sympathetic thoughts and prayers for him on Twitter was overwhelming.
We were brought to tears again.
— Penny (@pennyelizabeths) March 6, 2025
https://t.co/7ItSS2p193 pic.twitter.com/VP9EKRrj0U
— Chris Ahlers (@Chris_Ahlers) March 6, 2025
If this is true https://t.co/0lwj7f8hDN pic.twitter.com/c2yzvott3P
— S.T.U. (@Sarah_T_U) March 6, 2025
It truly warms the heart to see such caring and compassion for a downtrodden man like Biden, who just can’t catch a break.
The mystery is even further confounding in light of the fact that Joe Biden called his son ‘the smartest man I know.’
How could such a brilliant man have found himself in such dire financial straits?
How does a crackhead prostitute addict have debt?
I’m shocked! https://t.co/ik7S2YhIKL— Scott (@Scott824672085) March 6, 2025
This riddle is going to be tougher to crack (no pun intended) than the JFK assassination.
The good news, America, is that the poor man is not without resources. We have it on good authority that he has a lifeline he can tap into if his finances get bad enough.
Maybe he can ask for 10% from the Big Guy https://t.co/QXEhI9j2vZ
— FilmLadd (@FilmLadd) March 6, 2025
Unfortunately, we don’t know — nor does Philip Bump — who this invisible benefactor ‘the Big Guy’ is. And, sadly, we probably never will.
We’re guessing that the favorite son of the Biden family has his number on speed dial, though.
But if you have a chance to light a candle today, Twitchy readers, please light one for Hunter Biden.
We haven’t seen one person so unfairly beset by calamity after calamity since the Book of Job.
