The eyes are the window to the soulmate.
An Australian dating coach believes that beauty really is in the eye of the beholder after revealing a gaze-based flirting tactic that will make people “10 times more attractive” on dates.
“They’ll feel an undeniable pull toward you — without even realizing why,” Louanne Ward, a matchmaker and coach from Perth, revealed in a viral Instagram post.
Dubbed the “AT20 Eye Contact Rule” (Around-the-Target 20%), the corneal catnip method involves simply maintaining direct eye contact for 20% of the conversation while subtly shifting your gaze around their face for the other 80%.
The retinal ratio might seem counterintuitive given the number of relationship authorities who stress constant eye contact, but Ward argues that staring too much can feel “intense, creepy or confrontational.”
Conversely, avoiding meeting one’s gaze entirely can make you “come across as nervous, uninterested or lacking confidence,” said the Aussie.
“When you balance eye contact with subtle shifts (to their lips, cheekbones, or forehead), it creates a sense of natural intrigue and chemistry,” explained the date doctor, who says the law of attraction works by creating mystery.
“Slightly breaking eye contact at key moments makes them want to pull you back in,” Ward explained. “It feels natural and comfortable — it prevents the awkwardness of over-staring while still keeping you engaged.”
This eyeball-based technique, which she claims is “backed by psychology,” also “mimics romantic subconscious cues” because our “brains associate this gaze pattern with flirting, intimacy and chemistry,” she said.
Executing this technique during a romantic outing requires a bit of finesse.
“Hold direct eye contact when they’re speaking for about 20% of the time,” instructed Ward, who has 20 years of experience in the industry, the Daily Mail reported. “Let your gaze naturally shift around their face when listening — avoid robotic staring.”
She added, “When you look away, do it slowly and intentionally, rather than darting your eyes. Mix in a brief smile or smirk when re-establishing eye contact — this triggers warmth and connection.”
The allure of the peepers isn’t just snake-oil science, either.
A 2020 study by Netherlands scientists noted that eye contact is “one of the most important nonverbal cues used to communicate affection within romantic attraction and relational development dynamic.”
While researchers found that it doesn’t have a “direct effect on romantic attraction,” when it comes to initial interactions — such as a first date — “eye contact prompts less uncertainty, and more intimacy, as compared to communications without eye contact.”
