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Sprinkler System Gives Harvard Protesters a Much-Needed Bath – Twitchy

April 25, 2024
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You know what they say about karma. She can be a bey-otch. But what people often omit from that characterization is that while karma may suck for some people, it provides the rest of us with some delicious schadenfreude. 

This was the case early this morning on the campus of Harvard University, where overprivileged protesters — many of whom don’t even know why they are protesting — have been camped out for what seems like an eternity. Many of them claim to just be there to support ‘free Palestine,’ but let’s face facts. This is Harvard, America’s version of the Mos Eisley spaceport in Star Wars: a wretched hive of scum and villainy and antisemitism.

In their tent city of ‘Liberated Zone for Gaza Solidarity’ (where, mysteriously for a ‘grassroots’ uprising, all of the tents are identical), the Harvard brats got treated to a wonderful morning wake-up call: 

(Quick fact check: the temperature claim is, of course, false. It was 45 degrees overnight in Boston, not 32.)

You can go ahead and pick your meme to react to this horrifying news. ‘That’s a shame’ works, as does ‘Oh no … anyway’ or ‘Yes, yes, very sad.’

In any case, you can guess how sympathetic Twitter was to the plight of the now-sodden pro-Hamas students. 

Here are some of the best reactions:  

They haven’t been this oppressed since someone ‘misgendered’ them the other day.

But of course, the students are being targeted and are the victims here. How could they possibly have seen this watery sneak attack coming? 

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We want to buy those groundskeepers a beer. 

How dumb are they? Well, we’ll simply take this moment to remind everyone that Harvard admitted — and matriculated — David Hogg. 

Can you imagine the smell in the ‘Liberated Zone for Gaza Solidarity’? The sprinklers were a blessing from God for anyone within half a mile of the stenchy enclave. 

Oh, GOD yes. PLEASE, let there be video. 

[Insert Mandalorian nod in this space.]

DAMN YOU, ZIONIST SPRINKLERS. 

They don’t have time for that class. They’re too busy studying The Intersectional Race and Gender Ideologies of Harry Potter … or something (when they DO actually go to class, that is). 

OOF. That’s pretty dark, friend. (But still hilarious.)

Maybe we can arrange a ‘technical glitch’ in the sprinkler system where it just does not turn off. Ever. 

We wouldn’t want parched terrorist sycophants, now would we? 

Mainly though, Twitter was happy just to burst out in belly laughs for the karmic justice this morning at Harvard. 

Yep. Those all sum up our reaction too.

But in the end, didn’t the protesters get what they’ve always been asking for? 

HAHAHAHA. OK, we can’t beat that. 

You know what they say, Harvard students. ‘April showers bring May arrests and obliterated job prospects.’

That’s how that saying goes, isn’t it?



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