Play with Tay at your peril.
They may have only dated for only a few months in 2023, but that didn’t stop Taylor Swift from seemingly unleashing a wrath of words against 1975 frontman Matty Healy on her highly anticipated 11th studio album “The Tortured Poets Department,” which arrived on Friday.
In fact, Healy — who, before their summer split, was a rebound romance for the pop superstar following her breakup with British actor Joe Alwyn after six years — appears to be the subject of the vicious takedown “The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived.”
“And I don’t even want oil back/If just want to know/If rusting my sparkling summer was the goal,” sings Swift, who caught flak after Healy made some controversial comments — including racist remarks about the singer’s now BFF Ice Spice.
“And I don’t miss what we had,” she continues. “But could someone give a message/To the smallest man who ever lived.”
Ouch.
Other fans, however, may speculate the “sparkling summer” line is about Alwyn, as the pair split right before her Eras Tour and “Bejeweled” on her “Midnights” album is seemingly about the actor.
There are also hints that “I Can Fix Him” (No Really I Can)” — gotta love that title — might be about 35-year-old Healy.
“The smoke cloud billows out his mouth/Like a freight train through a small town/The jokes that he told across the bar were revolting/And far too loud/They shake their heads saying ‘God help her’ when I tell ‘em he’s my man/But your good Lord doesn’t need to/I can fix him/No, really I can,” she sings.
Even more, Swifties could assume “Fortnight” might be about Healy as the title is a British English term defined as “a period of two weeks,” which could refer to their short-lived romance. “Fortnight” is Swift’s first single off the album with collaborator Post Malone.
The titular track “The Tortured Poets Department” could refer to Healy, too, with the lyric: “Like, “Who uses typewriters anyway?”
In an interview with GQ in 2019, Healy revealed that he still uses typewriters. “I really like typewriters as well. I don’t have one with me because that is impractical, but the thing with typewriters and writing with pen to paper, there’s an element of commitment that goes with the ceremony with it,” he said at the time. “It therefore forces you to concentrate a bit better.”
Swift and Healy never confirmed their romance, but were spotted kissing during a Casa Cipriani date in New York City in May 2023.
Years earlier, Healy told E! News he had “exchanged numbers” with Swift in 2014.
“Let’s see what happens,” he said at the time. “I mean bloody hell, what am I going to do? Go out with Taylor Swift? She’s a sensation, I wouldn’t say no.”
After a brief summer fling, the pair ultimately split in June 2023.
But, of course, Healy also shares the ex attack with Alwyn, 33.
There’s even one song called “So Long, London” — a goodbye to the city where they once lived together. And just to show you how deep those Swift, 34, Easter eggs can be hidden, that track is 9 minutes and 28 seconds — which happens to line up with when the exes are rumored to have started dating on Sept. 28, 2016.
“Just how low did you think I’d go/Before I’d self implode,” Swift sings on the track.
“Every breath feels like the rarest air/When you’re not sure if he wants to be there,” she adds.
Alwyn, too, is rumored to figure in the album title, which seemingly puts a snarky spin on the name of a group chat, “The Tortured Man Club,” that he created with his fellow actors Paul Mescal and Andrew Scott.
Well played, Tay. Well played.
